tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-45528798047893983282011-11-30T14:01:51.571ZJust add his coffee, cake and kid...steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.comBlogger1501100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-63071386345640912792011-01-30T11:16:00.002Z2011-01-30T11:16:15.393Z

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-24118164964907546032011-01-12T17:49:00.001Z2011-01-12T17:50:14.866Z

Over in Canada a man is demanding compensation for a penis enlarger he bought that he claims didn’t work. Despite 500 hours of use. I know, 500 hours!! He’d better hope there’s not just a delayed effect on it and he starts punching holes in cars whilst trying to cross the road. So rather brilliantly he’s taking it to a small-claims court.The X4 Extender Deluxe Edition cost him $262. I’m presuming

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-15174360922017174652011-01-06T15:35:00.000Z2011-01-06T15:35:51.236Z

I have a rogue nose hair. I blew my nose on Monday and there it was: this long dark nasal hair dangling a centimetre down from my right nostril. Thick and black and menacing. I gasped and quickly reached for the little scissors required for such extraction. When I looked up... it had gone. Vanished. I investigated with a good old rummage but to my horror it had disappeared. AWOL. The awful

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-80879553819739590962011-01-04T15:05:00.004Z2011-01-04T15:09:17.053Z

Don’t know if you’ve heard but VAT has gone up to 20%. It’s not been mentioned much. “BEAT THE VAT INCREASE!” all the adverts screamed after Christmas, like it was a ferocious financial monster speeding towards us from over the horizon as we ran from it clutching our wide screen TVs, beds, kitchen appliances and sofas.Chancellor George Osborne, says he knows it’s tough. Stopping off to speak

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-5955152399854791632011-01-03T15:25:00.000Z2011-01-03T15:25:22.754Z

I've become obsessed with the birds in our garden this winter. With the death of our cat last year, the wild birds of Hertfordshire soon came to dance on his grave. They thrilled in his wake at fed at his wake.  They had very little shame, though to be fair he'd not tried his best to befriend them. Anyway, the bird feeder has always been there but this year they can't get enough. Maybe it's

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-64027693469889514722011-01-01T12:34:00.000Z2011-01-01T12:34:10.322Z

So... 2011 Which happens to be the fast train from Bishops Stortford to Liverpool Street. A quiet New Years Eve, but nice to be up in the early hours of the morning by choice and not because a screaming child has declared it to be so. Staying up long enough to see a generation of student's university fees be spent in 10 minutes of London Eye fireworks. A good evening of demolishing Quality

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-41971158750028760102010-11-21T15:05:00.000Z2010-11-21T15:05:43.554Z

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-42012897398209361382010-10-17T21:38:00.000+01:002010-10-17T21:38:51.498+01:00

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-1972178432743346642010-10-14T16:24:00.001+01:002010-10-14T16:30:10.614+01:00

So there I am in a pub waiting for a friend of mine and supping on my pint whilst flicking through the dregs of one of those free London papers which save you from looking at other people. Scanning through the Live Music pages: Michael Buble, Usher, Simply Red, The Script, Gorrilaz, Thin Lizzy, Question of Sport.. Woah, hang on. What? Friday 12th November, Wembley Arena.. A Question of Sport

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-62901135193147468982010-10-13T15:24:00.001+01:002010-10-13T16:53:15.935+01:00

One of the great things about sending your baby to nursery is that it opens them up to new experiences. Since being there our son's picked up sharing, crawling, standing, waving and now: chicken pox. Yep, plenty of disease in fact. You work all week to pay lots of money to have someone look after your child and then the child gets ill because of the nursery, but you can't send them there.. so

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-38627026039390730092010-10-05T14:27:00.000+01:002010-10-05T14:27:25.033+01:00

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-46904462446477754782010-10-04T11:47:00.000+01:002010-10-04T11:47:54.512+01:00

Very excited. Back in June I did a load of work as a script writer on a big project for the BBC. It was for an online game called Muddle Earth. If you've not heard of it, Muddle Earth is a very popular children's book which was then turned into a TV cartoon by CBBC and now in turn into an online game. Muddle Earth is a bit of a parody of the Tolkein worlds full of magic and mystery.. but with

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-87030459465829309712010-09-28T21:31:00.001+01:002010-09-28T21:33:00.070+01:00

I wonder whether the bosses of train company First Capital Connect ever check Twitter. They needn't leave those customer surveys on the seats like they sometimes do. They could just take a look and see what people think of them in less than 149 characters. I should point out I don't use FCC, have no vendetta against them and haven't spent ages filtering search results by the way, the following

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-57026118571988069692010-09-21T14:34:00.003+01:002010-09-21T14:36:29.122+01:00

There’s a new book out all about the British Secret Service at the start of the last century until the end of World War II. The author had access to their files and some of it’s amazing. Especially the bit about them experimenting with different kinds of invisible ink during the First World War. What did they find was the most effective ink?Semen. I know. Handy. Rather brilliantly the discovery

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-45117009217233634962010-09-12T18:28:00.003+01:002010-09-12T18:30:43.131+01:00

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-33584016065253213842010-09-09T15:03:00.003+01:002010-09-09T15:09:02.479+01:00

Have you seen that Google’s changed? It now has "Google Instant" No longer do internet searches have to be percolated or plunged from a Google-tiere, no.. just one spoon, add boiling water and you know what you wanted to know.Basically it tries to guess what you’re typing and starts searching before you’ve finished. A bit like those annoying people who try and finish your sentance and then get

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-25163211069795888872010-08-01T16:25:00.001+01:002010-09-09T15:08:18.302+01:00

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-57996151434670606042010-07-25T20:20:00.006+01:002010-07-25T22:36:30.055+01:00

  It's the first video podcast since the start of May! It's all just been a bit busy with the launch of Jack FM in Hertfordshire, our trip to Oz, a shed load of script writing I've been doing for CBBC, oh and of course being a Dad. But it's back and it includes boobs, cows and dogs eating ice cream. Splendid, worth the wait. It's also the first one we've done in 'HD'.. well, it might not look

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-48522233160950012162010-07-25T10:04:00.001+01:002010-07-25T13:06:14.192+01:00

After 5 years of adverts, BT are letting us choose the fate of Adam and Jane! If you need bringing up to date you can either watch all of them here.. or get a hobby. By visiting BT's special website you can help decide what should happen next in their series... I LOVE the British public's responses so far: Adam and Jane change to the new BT browser and find it's as rubbish as we're finding it

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-13976437807646786982010-06-02T20:46:00.000+01:002010-06-02T20:46:33.703+01:00

I had my first conference call today. I know, I know. How very grown up. In a way it's great: there's no way I'd have been able to sit there with my flip flop'd feet up on the table eating an ice cream in a board room. How were they to know? In another way, it's very odd. There are lots of uncomfortable gaps in the conversation because you really need eye contact to have a proper multi-person

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-74577625186167658182010-06-01T16:12:00.000+01:002010-06-01T16:12:03.194+01:00

I was having a chat with my nephew yesterday. He's only four years old and is very excited about his first World Cup. He was telling me he'd joined a football club and then went on to explain to me how football worked: 1. 'You can't pick up the ball as that's cheating' 2. 'Two people fall over a lot' 3. 'A man blows a whistle' To be fair, he knows more about it than me.

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-47491310097586960932010-06-01T15:53:00.000+01:002010-06-01T15:53:42.822+01:00

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-69083234733146326132010-05-24T15:38:00.000+01:002010-05-24T15:38:11.237+01:00

Supermarkets really do define social classes don't they? Never was this more clear than this afternoon. When I'm in Tesco I often hear kids saying in a whiney voice: "Muuu-uum can we get some sweets?" "Muu-uum I WANT some CRISPS!!" But today in Waitrose I heard: "Mummy, shall I get the brioche?"

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-79418527228328433522010-05-23T09:16:00.000+01:002010-05-23T09:16:17.357+01:00

1. Always rinse the bath out properly before bathtime.  I think it's fair to say that you shouldn't find pubic hair on them for at least another 12 years. 2. If you have a bath toy Octopus by all means call him 'Olly' but if you have a bath toy Whale refrain from calling him 'Willy'. It's fine for a while until you shout out 'Come and look! He's playing with Willy in the bath!' whilst your

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-27338484347314153372010-04-28T21:17:00.000+01:002010-04-28T21:17:37.874+01:00

It's the latest video podcast from Newslite.tv and ooh it's shot in a new way.. I'd like to be able to say that this was a brave new direction (and no, not just 'brave' because people will actually be able to see my face up close) in which to take the presentational style.. ..but the truth is I got  a new MacBook and the old microphone didn't seem to work so the only way for you to hear me was

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-80849733201323574372010-04-23T07:51:00.001+01:002010-04-23T07:58:32.287+01:00

The brilliant Cassette Boy who did that awesome 'Apprentice' video last year is back on form and has been watching The One Show.

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-65326863639779102192010-04-06T09:02:00.000+01:002010-04-06T09:02:40.989+01:00

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-10672624571013065662010-04-03T11:23:00.001+01:002010-04-03T13:07:12.636+01:00

The great thing about April Fool's Day is that for one day of the year loads of people actually get creative and use an imagination that they thought they'd left behind in their teenage years. The sad thing about April Fools Day is that sometimes the silly things created for it would actually make the world a better place if they existed. I want to cling on to their existence way past the 12

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-79023232886127254412010-03-28T20:57:00.001+01:002010-03-28T20:59:07.399+01:00

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-19073873471262287632010-03-20T14:52:00.003Z2010-03-20T15:18:25.813Z

Things A Dad Learns Whilst Weaning His Baby1. Those spoons that change colour if food is too hot are brilliant! I could do with one for my dinner. Especially when I'm eating soup. Or crumble and custard.2. At first they just don't get the whole 'opening mouth and taking food off the spoon' thing so it feels a bit like a like you're using Polyfilla on a large crack in the wall. Even though it's

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-1386900926998768052010-03-14T09:56:00.003Z2010-03-14T10:46:33.315Z

Becoming a parent has finally made me realise that Mother's Day isn't just a cynical ploy by Greetings Card manufacturers and florists to get us to spend money (though the same is surely still true of Valentine's Day), nor is it merely an excuse for Simply Red to release another Love Songs album (though it's a happy coincidence that keeps Mick Hucknall in curlers).For the first time in my life I

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-40530897500999665192010-03-14T09:51:00.003Z2010-03-14T09:56:13.047Z

Ah, it's another Weird Week including my favourite Dad Joke about Lady GaGa as a scarecrow that I think I've done yet. Oh, and a high chair for dogs? Come on, you can't say I waste my afternoons...

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-9993432872673807262010-02-28T09:42:00.001Z2010-02-28T09:47:26.617Z

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-84827723315717943972010-02-22T08:36:00.001Z2010-02-22T08:36:50.538Z

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-67202300892045729512010-02-21T07:00:00.003Z2010-02-21T08:33:48.204Z

Has Christmas come early? Or is it refusing to leave ahead of the Spring?This lonesome Santa stands proud amongst the tempting treats of a Hertfordshire Shell garage. For ages he was hiding behind a box of Creme Eggs, but now he's managed to climb to the front. He stands all alone like he's the first Santa to turn up for Christmas. A full 10 months early. The Mars Duos look at him with confusion

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-29954239742388369402010-02-16T16:20:00.003Z2010-02-16T16:23:07.798Z

It appears I'm not allowed to give my son a bath. For I do not have the required Laser Eyes.Disappointing.

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-60066369746187846352010-02-07T16:42:00.000Z2010-02-07T16:43:03.903Z

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-25704335838392102342010-02-01T16:01:00.003Z2010-02-01T16:08:24.892Z

It's another Weird Week for the lovely folk at Newslite.tv. The girl with the Pokemon is actually from Hertfordshire (Welwyn Garden City in fact) so yay for her. Seriously though, how is all of that stuff in their house? Have they taken out the foam in the sofa and stuffed it with Pokemon? Have they insulated their house with Pokemon Cavity Wall Insulation? I just hope they don't use too many

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-17833247803228973772010-01-26T10:32:00.004Z2010-01-26T16:46:57.159Z

So the UK is out of Recession is it? Have you seen what figure they’re basing that much trumpeted fact on? Towards the end of 2009, the economy grew by 0.1% One Tenth of a Percent!!It shrank by about 6% in the first place and it’s grown by 0.1?! And the thing is that’s worse than they predicted: they were getting ready to get excited over the thought it would be a growth of 0.4% ! Now, I'm no

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-84277536166414708622010-01-24T16:19:00.004Z2010-01-24T17:17:21.618Z

Ah, it must be another Weird Week via the lovely people at Newslite.tv.Today I went for my first run of 2010. I haven't been for a run for a very long time. I was shamed in to going after filling in a questionnaire at the doctors recently. I handed it back and the receptionist glanced through it and said 'Er, Mr Folland you haven't filled in the section about how much exercise you do a week'. 'I

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-13391791380353521392010-01-20T11:11:00.004Z2010-01-20T11:21:40.266Z

Bless. You have to feel for British bobsleigher Gillian Cooke at the World Championships in Switzerland. Well, when I say 'feel' for her.. maybe at an arms length. There she was about to give her country everything she's got when she instead showed us everything.. Apparently the GB team are doing quite well, they're still behind at the moment and the gap seems to be widening but... And you know

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-28506847496617525332010-01-17T08:25:00.006Z2010-01-17T08:37:00.869Z

The first Weird Week of 2010 that I've done for Newslite. Who wants some pictures of tiny dogs on planes? Of course you do, so tuck right in.Also this week I've done our first ever Enhanced podcast for Hertbeat FM. Now I know many of you will say you prefer the natural look and we didn't need to enhance anything and bless your hearts, but basically this was a way of letting you see the same

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-71143465969563399202010-01-12T21:56:00.004Z2010-01-12T22:45:40.604Z

In the 11 weeks of being a Dad, these have become the favourite songs for my boy..1. "NAPPY" - Sung to the tune of Leona Lewis' 'Happy' it goes something like 'I just want a clean.. Nappy'. At times of great stench, reach for the Power Ballad.2. "SPLISH & SPLOSH" - My own composition, 'Splish and Splosh, Splish and Splosh, We're having a wash' (often followed by 'Don't you cry, don't you cry, I'm

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-43659239443824283382010-01-11T17:49:00.003Z2010-01-11T18:01:22.577Z

Hoorah for the fine people at Newslite.tv for whom I record the video podcast Weird Week, for they've been named by the Guardian in their 100 Essential Websites list!I mean really... There's a lot of websites out there (about 183 million at the last count apparently) and they're in the top 100! Listed alongside the likes of Flickr and Google and the brilliant Hype Machine.Newlsite is a great

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-22990561390031788322010-01-07T16:51:00.003Z2010-01-07T19:54:11.074Z

This snow is just getting annoying now. When Dean Martin sang 'Let it Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Snow' he clearly didn't have to get up and go to work. Maybe he liked the thought of sitting in queues of traffic. Maybe he liked watching Jeremy Kyle.At first it's beautiful. The snowfall itself is magical. The silence it brings. The blanket, so untouched. I like the fact that for those cat owners

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-76661753085800632422009-12-23T09:02:00.002Z2009-12-23T09:04:50.630Z

I'm a big fan of 24 so was very excited to hear that there's a Christmas Special...

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-89418317901819883232009-12-22T09:10:00.003Z2009-12-22T09:20:30.501Z

One of our listeners was on holiday in Europe this year and David Fonseca was the man who was always being played on the radio at the time. So much so that when they came home they asked us to play one of his songs, which we did. He's Portugese (David Fonseca, not the listener, he's from Knebworth) and I ended up on his mailing list. I've no idea what most of the e-mails say as I don't speak/read

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-59243884162006504072009-12-11T21:54:00.006Z2009-12-11T22:23:58.479Z

My wife is out tonight so I've taken the opportunity to wrap her Christmas presents. I like this moment once a year of great Christmas tunes, a nice boozy drink, some chocolates as you catch up on unopened calendar doors and more great tunes. This year of course I've also been looking after a 6 week old boy, so I've managed the tunes and one present and a glass of water.My favourite tune found,

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-41931247205370583632009-11-21T14:14:00.002Z2009-11-21T14:28:47.783Z

We're heading towards the four week mark. What have I learnt?1. It's worth becoming a Dad if only to have someone who enjoys your singing2. You'd think that when you become a Dad, you'd start enjoying the BBC's annual charity event Children In Need. Apparently this is not the case. You still don't enjoy watching newsreaders dance.3. Never ever get too cocky about how good you are at changing

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-57181523291610385452009-11-17T16:20:00.004Z2009-11-18T21:27:46.852Z

I think it's testament to how well we've settled in to a parental pattern (the term 'pattern' whilst suggesting structure doens't necessarily always have to mean that the design makes sense.. I think where we've got to is like those Magic Eye pictures from the '90s, if you stare at our lives for long enough eventually an image of what we should look like might start appearing to your senses)

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-37006071007975370862009-11-11T13:27:00.002Z2009-11-11T13:36:59.430Z

One thing about being a Dad is that it makes you feel very manly and you feel a sudden urge to be manly in other ways.I feel I should know how to change that tyre/fit that washing machine/fix the uneven floorboard.I give up at boilers however and get a man in. I still want to sound wise though so I spend the morning on various websites swotting up on my central heating system.The man arrives.

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-47716316670144323622009-11-10T13:19:00.003Z2009-11-10T13:21:30.783Z

Not spotted by me, but by the brilliant Pop Justice team: it's your favourite/most hated* (delete as applicable) X Factor moronic munchkins John & Edward as seen in the supermarket.

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-13781818347984795452009-11-10T01:53:00.004Z2009-11-10T02:07:48.024Z

Ah, the serenity of a night feed.Sneaking down stairs with a slightly whimpering baby to prepare the bottle. Talking away to him about everything you're doing like a softly spoken, high pitched commentator on The Great Milk Race.It's a beautiful moment in many ways between parent and child.Ooh and who's that at the window? It's Atticus the Catticus! Shall we let him in and say hello?! Shall we?!

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-92099392599634545712009-11-08T08:39:00.003Z2009-11-08T08:56:30.102Z

I've had a few lovely experiences so far:There's been the obligatory peeing whilst lying down naked incident of course.Sorry, I should have said I'm talking about nappy changing, this isn't some strange forum to confess my dirty mishaps of years gone by. And anyway, they were very understanding about it. Could happen to anyone apparently. Just not perhaps in a library.Anyway, yes.. you know the

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-43476126040731143672009-11-04T15:30:00.002Z2009-11-04T15:45:15.298Z

So, the Folland Family have been on their first family outing! It only took 3 hours to leave the house, but it was a flawless escapade.I was the proudest man alive that afternoon. Not just because because I got the buggy up in one smooth motion (this time, I fully rehearsed it at home first so as to look like a Pro-Dad) but because.. well.. because this is my family. I couldn't stop smiling and I

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-60509230605188173902009-11-03T16:34:00.002Z2009-11-04T09:52:44.158Z

It's been just a week since my son was born and 5 days of that have been at home. What have I learnt?1. Learn how to use the car seat before you drive to the hospital to pick up your newborn. You don't want to be wrestling it in a dark car park for 15 minutes while a mini bus full of care patients watch you for entertainment.2. Learn how to put your child in the car seat before you go into the

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-2389391071421549492009-10-31T06:54:00.004Z2009-10-31T19:49:24.668Z

3 and a half days ago I became a Dad! And I thought that would be the end of sitting around watching TV/reading blogs online etc.. but no.. not when on night two of your baby boy being at home he gets incredible wind because you cooked your wife a lovely dish involving loads of roast onions and garlic and that in turn is in her milk and now in the baby and bless him he's only just been using that

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-87460635855420173942009-10-30T10:23:00.002Z2009-10-30T11:11:45.229Z

Tuesday afternoon my life changed forever when at 16.56 little Fraser Edmund joined the Folland clan. It was an emergency c-section. One moment my wife was in a bed and I'd been told to 'go and get the bags' out of the car; the next moment, I'm back with the bags and the room is full of people in blue/green scrubs uniforms and my wife's in a hospital gown and in a blur of activity a nurse grabs

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-40713390118845285662009-10-24T12:01:00.003+01:002009-10-24T12:15:18.836+01:00

Wow. Just realised I have't written anything for the whole of October?! How lame is that?Basically I've been just too busy waiting to become a Dad. We're now a week overdue and it's like someone keeps shifting what day Christmas Day is. You know it's going to be soon, you put up all the decorations and get yourself excited and then it turns out it isn't the 25th at all, nor the 26th, 27th etc..

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-34198101381854015852009-09-30T17:38:00.003+01:002009-09-30T17:47:54.607+01:00

I tried to be grown up and listen to Gordon Brown's party conference speech yesterday in a sensible manner. But his list of achievements started to sound like those people trying to remember what they'd seen on The Generation Game didn't you think? There was just something about it...

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-63890836932951926002009-09-29T16:21:00.003+01:002009-09-29T16:28:55.786+01:00

So.. I'm about to become a Dad in a matter of weeks!And it's at this point you can't help but think... what will my child be like?Will it take after me? Will it look like me? Will it behave like me?If you remember what happened to me back in April (and by the way it's still touring with Beyonce now on her World Tour don't forget!) then maybe this is glimpse of the future...

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-85621822903321510722009-09-28T09:44:00.004+01:002009-09-28T18:34:22.416+01:00

My favourite moment from the X Factor this year so far..When reaching for fame.. It's good to stay grounded.

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-60915855070573334722009-09-20T12:42:00.002+01:002009-09-20T12:44:45.109+01:00

Ah, it's another Weird Week from Newslite.TV - including a woman who will carve a statue of your head as a present... out of cheese. Just imagine..

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-28615437274277933782009-09-10T09:44:00.006+01:002009-09-10T17:33:58.100+01:00

If you're annoyed with Derren Brown this morning (or annoyed with yourself for having stayed up late when you knew you had to get up early, just to watch his stupid wizard ways)(or annoyed because your wife says he's quite hot.. when you know that he's just managed to somehow brainwash her..) then let this be your antedote.It's singer Pete Yorn with that nice girl in the pants in that film with

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-25429499640857324832009-09-02T13:50:00.000+01:002009-09-02T13:51:38.992+01:00

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-48284686326426921992009-08-31T11:36:00.002+01:002009-08-31T11:44:26.789+01:00

So, you know when a newspaper prints something in error and they have to make an apology in a later edition... Well, this is from The Sun."In an article published under the headline 'Golum joker killed in live rail horror', we incorrectly stated that Julian Brooker, 23, of Brighton, was blown 15ft into the air after accidentally touching a live railway line. His parents have asked us to make

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-49306705030903894582009-08-30T16:29:00.003+01:002009-08-30T16:35:18.866+01:00

We've just bought our cat a new litter box.I hope he enjoys it more than the cat in the picture on the box itself.Look at it. That face says "WHAT? NEVER SEEN A CAT POO BEFORE?! Honestly! Leave me alone! Go on! How would you like it if I hung around outside the bathroom door waiting to take post-dump photos of your face?! You're worse than the Paparazzi. You're the Pooparazzi! Honestly, I

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-76468949363125957912009-08-23T12:41:00.004+01:002009-08-23T12:47:17.205+01:00

Things you say that mean you're getting old No. 327"You know, I'm really impressed with this new kitchen towel. Plenty is the future I think. You can actually just use one sheet to wipe like a cloth, even on carpet and wring it out! Yep, it's good stuff."Shoot me now.(Don't worry: the blood will be so easy to soak up, you'll barely notice the mess or the stress!)

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-51791119082426786992009-08-22T16:56:00.002+01:002009-08-22T17:04:12.270+01:00

I think I've found my place on the cultural ladder.Today in Cambridge I walked past a succession of buskers: A girl and her guitar.. I walked on by. A girl and her friend who had a guitar (and a red top hat).. I walked on by. A string quartert... didn't bat an eyelid.. A man with a didgeridoo.. walked on by whislt actively sneering (my Australian wife because he was not Aboriginal and me because

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-79877442753884846122009-08-13T09:36:00.003+01:002009-08-13T09:45:51.819+01:00

So.. you're sitting by a stunning lake in Canada (Lake Minnewanka as it happens but let's not get sidetracked by thinking along those lines, grow up) when you decide you'd like to capture the moment.So you set your camera up on auto mode and run back to sit next to your wife and get ready to smile.The camera goes 'whirr whirr' as it focuses in between the 'beep beep' of the countdown 'beep' and

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-36246668551039471702009-08-10T18:19:00.001+01:002009-08-10T18:20:31.042+01:00

Yes! It's really here! www.hertbeat.com/book

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-47496051708018786822009-08-01T20:02:00.003+01:002009-08-01T20:11:25.464+01:00

The latest Hertbeat Breakfast podcast is available now through iTunes and includes more Killer Chipmunks, Space Cheese, Roundabout Rules, Upset Listeners and Pants Up Bums. Just another week then.Also today I did a hour of live links from Hitchin Market between 12 and 1. I don't normally like working extra hours at the weekend as I think it's important to chill and spend time with family and

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-73004645646698424202009-08-01T09:55:00.003+01:002009-08-01T10:00:33.218+01:00

Here's the latest video podcast I've done for Newslite.tv including Smart Tossing, Mass Showers and Blow Up Dolls for Dogs. Oh, and Zombies. A class way to spend 5 minutes. (I mean as in.. spend 5 minutes watching the podcast, not 5 minutes in a shower with some zombies and over amorous labradors whilst...)

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-57975124407944763402009-07-17T17:13:00.002+01:002009-07-17T17:26:13.464+01:00

The trouble with our vacuum cleaner is it's one of those ones that follows you around and it pumps really hot air out of itself and on to your legs as you clean.The trouble with the weather this afternoon was it was really muggy.The trouble with vacuuming in a muggy house is you soon become really hot and sweaty. You soon decide to take your socks off. But you're still very hot. So you take your

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-75504598287950807332009-07-17T07:31:00.005+01:002009-07-17T07:54:21.286+01:00

So you're sitting in the cinema when a short film comes up before the main feature. You think 'hang on, that actor's got the same name as my boyfriend'...Then you see your boyfriend's head on the big screen (along with the rest of the packed cinema) and he's lip-syncing to Daniel Bedingfield's If You're Not The One. And the camera pans out and his nipples appear.. Dear God, he's got no clothes on

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-13719990257155577472009-07-16T16:48:00.003+01:002009-07-16T16:57:07.412+01:00

I've never been so happy to see a barcode.But then this is my barcode. Well, not 'mine', it's not that I'm having it tattoo'd on my buttocks for scanning should people need to know who I am (I guess I'd be known as the man who keeps dropping his kecks in Waitrose asking people to 'bleep' his posteria). I mean: it's the barcode for my book Dear Mr DJ!A special machine created this unique pattern

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-18608788300160793152009-07-15T06:40:00.003+01:002009-07-15T06:53:56.087+01:00

So the new Harry Potter film is out today and after weeks of tireless media coverage I can't help but think that the Potter publicity machine is running out of steam.I just read this: Harry Potter star Emma Watson is a spellbinding table tennis player, it was revealed yesterday.Right.The rest of the story really does seem wrong if taken out of context though, so forget I told you about ping-pong:

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-23238919990414409972009-07-14T15:33:00.003+01:002009-07-14T15:44:39.483+01:00

Even though this was available at the weekend I'm posting it now as a blatant attempt to do something to get out of going for a run. I haven't watched it yet and can't remember what was in it although the phrases 'hot dogs', 'ugly dogs' and 'trails of vomit' ring a bell. In fact I might watch it now. By the time it's over it'll be too late for that run...

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-66904817047277314962009-07-08T15:38:00.004+01:002009-07-09T16:11:49.303+01:00

I've become enchanted by Lisa Hannigan's new single I Don't Know and thought I'd download the album Sea Sew. Hugely recommend you do to - have a listen below. You can also click on the player to download the mp3s. And if you watch Lisa Hannigan - I Don't Know video on you tube, you'll find the most interesting interior decorating ever. Really, I thought it took ages to paint our lounge, that must

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-78948495325883874262009-07-07T17:32:00.002+01:002009-07-07T17:43:43.475+01:00

People Who Just Don't Think - Number 2771I'm selling a chest of drawers from Ikea on eBay. They cost about £45 new. I put 'Collection Only' on the listing.I had a message from a potential buyer asking if it would be possible be to sufficiently wrap the product so that it could be collected by courier.??!!!Can you imagine how much bubble wrap that would take? And how would you get it all of the

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-27818860113652261042009-07-07T17:08:00.002+01:002009-07-07T17:28:20.825+01:00

I've done it!! It's finally done!!The final layouts of the children's book I've been working on are done and dusted and uploading to Badger Publishing as I speak.Badger then collects them all overnight (he's nocturnal) and checks through them and fingers crossed he'll pass them on to his printer! He's lovely. Thank you Badger for not getting grumpy with me for taking so long in finishing this. I

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-1401535864475950632009-07-02T08:36:00.002+01:002009-07-02T10:44:05.373+01:00

Did you see Tom Jones at Glastonbury?! Amazing.He's lost the dyed black hair which made him look like Ming The Merciless after a pie-bender and he looks great... But can he move like he used to?!Well. No.You have to watch this video of him doing "Kiss". It's 23 years since he released it and I think he might be regretting the extended instrumental started by the words "I think I'd better dance

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-21788897908984101982009-07-01T20:40:00.003+01:002009-07-01T20:47:06.936+01:00

The worst job?The ball girls and boys who have to stand there holding the sweaty towels at Wimbledon for the players to add sweat to in between points.I don't remember them doing this years ago; but now all of them do it - usually between every single point. Just think what those towels must be like!Isn't there an EU law protecting the rights of ball girls/boys against such horrors?On a similar

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-31275179495280284662009-06-29T15:52:00.003+01:002009-06-29T16:00:18.990+01:00

Life Lesson 3781Never pick a fight with the tupperware in your tupperware cupboard.Nothing good can ever come from it. Instead why not install huge glass shelves right across your kitchen on which to display your collection in all their glory? It will look so lovely you'll soon even forget your family are in the room. However, you'll also have a scary look on your face forever as you gingerly

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-33837794729915636402009-06-28T14:59:00.002+01:002009-06-28T15:01:58.463+01:00

The latest 'Weird Week'. It's got dogs on surf boards and at the end of day, isn't that all we can ask of life?

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-80174170773092928162009-06-24T20:12:00.002+01:002009-06-24T20:15:29.212+01:00

A snail has been eating huge chunks out of the mint in my herb garden.I have a plan to catch the little blighter.Tomorrow I plan to line them all up and make them breathe on me. I'll show 'em.

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-45146038036383659212009-06-23T15:48:00.002+01:002009-06-23T15:52:04.372+01:00

VOICEMAIL:You have one new message:"Yeah, Hi Steve it's Dad..."Erm, maybe you can help...."Do you have a... man bag?.."Do you know what one is?.."Apparently I need to get one..."A... Man... Bag? Is that right?.."Speak to you later. Bye.

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-31041376251499853082009-06-21T16:15:00.001+01:002009-06-21T16:18:03.334+01:00

Overheard today in a shop in Bluewater.A lady was buying a 'Green Is The New Black' reusable 'bag for life' shopping bag.Shop Assistant:"That'll be £1.50 please...""Thankyou...""Would you like a bag for that?"!!!!

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-35535598340614267952009-06-17T17:02:00.002+01:002009-06-17T17:15:36.211+01:00

I was in London today and went to get a bus.The bus stop had a sign on it saying it was not in use, but there was a queue of people and when I looked around I couldn't see any road/building works to give any reason for it not being in use. So I joined the queue.When the bus came, sure enough it stopped suggesting that the bus stop was indeed in use. I got on last and swiped my Oyster card and

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-86516993769164965782009-06-14T15:59:00.002+01:002009-06-14T16:12:51.041+01:00

Here's my latest video podcast for newslite.tvIncludes gay penguins, a USB microwave and my worst pirate impression yet.

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-61595659346301062982009-06-11T16:18:00.002+01:002009-06-11T16:22:30.402+01:00

There's a lot of Smiths covers around at the moment.Here's one to make up for Mark Ronson's Stop Me.It's absolutely brilliant. Go on, download it too.Help put a smile on Morrisey's face for once. Amazon.co.uk Widgets

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-11560763545293002222009-06-08T16:05:00.006+01:002009-06-08T16:16:21.474+01:00

Ross Kemp has a new show tonight. After going after British gangs and serving on the front line in Afghanistan twice Grant Mitchell, whose travel insurance premium must be obscene - I mean, Afghanistan’s airports are notorious for losing your luggage for a start - is now off in search of pirates. No, sadly not the swashbuckling, fancy dress, Captain Hook types, although give it ten years and he’

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-42208604420086692312009-06-07T12:45:00.004+01:002009-06-07T13:01:02.495+01:00

So the insanity continues.Little did we know when we donned our leotards for our Beyonce tribute video back in February that it'd still be showing its ugly head (and lets face it, showing an awful lot more too) six months later.Last week I got e-mails from quite a few listeners giving me the news: our video was being featured in Beyonce's world tour.WORLD TOUR.Our video. On her world tour. That's

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-17946468776867443352009-06-07T12:43:00.001+01:002009-06-07T12:45:27.427+01:00

Here's the latest video podcast. It's quite satisfying saying "Penguin Poo".

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-22303139987825565062009-06-06T12:04:00.002+01:002009-06-06T12:08:33.306+01:00

The latest Best of Breakfast podcast is available now through iTunes or hertbeat.com Including people who have monkeys as babies. Truly. And the most astonishing news yet about my dancing exploits. Listen in now to find out more but I'll tell you more here soon.

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-45497115530460221682009-05-31T15:14:00.004+01:002009-05-31T15:34:20.864+01:00

We had a lovely night out in London but the worst luck on public transport trying to get home.Our first chosen line (Victoria) was closed for engineering works. Our second (Circle) was experiencing 'severe delays'. So we got on our third (District) because at least it was in the right direction. Two stops later the train came to halt at Westminster, the driver was sorry 'there seems to be a

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-74785749921808612102009-05-30T14:52:00.002+01:002009-05-30T15:06:04.225+01:00

Here's the latest video podcast I've done for newslite.tvCan't believe I've lost the ability to do a decent Columbo impression.A sad day. Must remember to take it off my C.V.

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-51142208155496217692009-05-28T11:05:00.002+01:002009-05-28T11:09:17.242+01:00

Thankyou so much to one of our listeners who sent this youtube clip through to me today.I haven't laughed so much in ages, it's genius.It's got some bad language kids, okay! So don't moan at me, I warned you. It's nothing you wouldn't here on The Apprentice though...

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-26795374799899153122009-05-27T16:12:00.002+01:002009-05-27T16:29:44.458+01:00

Ohmygod. It's really happening.I got home today and awaiting me was a contract from a publisher! In fact not a publisher. My Publisher. Darling. Sweetie.How did this happen?! I'm going to have a book published! It's very exciting and the first mock up copy we had done looked great anyway but since then we've done some re-writing/re-drawing and cut stuff out and I can't wait to know it's off to

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4552879804789398328.post-64579372782075780852009-05-26T17:21:00.004+01:002009-05-26T17:37:51.431+01:00

I love the library. I'd love to say it's because it's an almost communist vision of a literary utopia; a place where we can all go as one to harvest the fruits that others have grown; a land where we are all in harmony united by information in a hushed reverance to words.But I've got a feeling it's just because they give me stuff for free.Really though, why buy a book when you can get them for

steve fhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01133154309754766610noreply@blogger.com0